Things I Know : About Family

Part of my family, a part I’ve really grown close to over the last 8 months, is moving 13 hours away, leaving next weekend.  It got me thinking about things I know about family.

Family is a funny thing. They can make us the happiest, the angriest, the craziest, the saddest, and they can hurt us more than anyone else. But at the end of the day, when all the bullshit is said and done, family will always have your back. At the end of the day, you can’t de-family them. Well, you can try, and some very much succeed, but they are always in your heart, or in the back of your mind, and that relationship is always “there” even if no relationship actually exists!

I moved to the other side of the world when I was 18. My sisters were 14, and 12, so I wasn’t there for a crucial part of their childhood – the growing into adults part! One sister clued into email and chat pretty quickly (yes, I moved before days of internet!) and she and I kept in touch much more than my sister who is moving and I did. I think we both thought when I moved home we’d be closer.

Then when I moved home, we had a huge falling out and didn’t speak for 2 years. She missed the birth of my son. But after 2 years, we bridged the gap, and slowly mended the cracks, just in time for our dad to pass away. The 3 of us have been closer than ever, ever since.


Now she is moving away, and taking my niece with her. I know it’s a good opportunity for them. I know it’s not the end of the world. I know it is easy to go visit when we can. But none of that makes it any easier to know they’ll be so much further away. I know now, some of the feeling that we put my husband’s family through when we moved to the other side of the world. Only it must have been so much harder on them, because the other side of the world is much longer than  a 13 hour drive.

Every time we fought as kids, mum always said we’d be the best of friends when we were older. We thought she was nuts! Now I can see what she meant. I know that I have probably taken having my sister close by for granted. I know, that for the next 3 years, I’m going to watch my niece grow up on a computer. I know I’m going to have to get over this fear and get on a plane (or go for a few VERY long drives!) again. I know that I am going to miss my sister, and my niece, like crazy.

What do you know? Does your family live close, or far away?

Flogging my blog today with Grace!


7 thoughts on “Things I Know : About Family

  1. Lovely post, Aroha. Family sure is a funny thing. Crazy how you can have rip roaring barneys one minute and be their best friend the next 🙂 I’m very lucky to have my family live close by.

    It must be so tough for you to have your sister move. Thank God for skype though! I hope you have a great last few days together before the move.

  2. I totally hear you about family – they sure are a strange kettle of fish sometimes !!! I know how hard it is going to be for you when your sister moves, but the good thing about the world we live in is that the technology helps us stay in touch so much easier than ever before. And, as you say – you can either take long drives or fly and have really good quality time with them.
    Spend as much time with them as you can and enjoy each others company !
    Love, hugs and positive energy !

  3. “Every time we fought as kids, mum always said we’d be the best of friends when we were older. ” My mum used to say that to my brother and I, and we would LAUGH!!!! It is true though. Unfortunately he lives 10 hours away and has for a while, however I think that has strengthened our relationship.

  4. This is such a sweet post. Most of my family live closeby but I moved away when I was 18 too for many years and came back just before my daughter was born. It’s taken a while to build up stronger bonds with my sisters again but I’m glad I’m back by their sides, and being here to take care of our parents.

    Ai @ Sakura Haruka

  5. Oh, Aroha! Big hugs, my dear. I lived overseas from my family for almost a decade and it was tough. While I’m back in the same country, I’m not in the same city and while I love my family, I like that distance. It’s not too far away but there’s enough distance where I don’t have to worry about “surprise call-in’s” 🙂

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