Eight years ago today, this happened:
I had this big post planned about 8 things – 8 things that we’ve done in the last 8 years, 8 pieces of advice I would give these two in the gazebo, and 8 things I love about my husband. Then I went shopping for a card for our anniversary, and I wanted to vomit after each one I read. I’m sorry, but I am so far from “sappy” it’s ridiculous. It got me thinking, do all couples buy into this romantic crap around their anniversary? Where are all the cards that are representative of “real life”? I imagine there’s a lot of women out there who are so over it they’d really just like a card that says exactly what they feel. So I thought I’d share 8 Anniversary cards I think should be on the shelf, but aren’t.
Dear Husband, I love you, even though you never put your bowl in the dishwasher. But seriously, the dishwasher is RIGHT THERE where you put the bowl in the sink. Right there. Happy Anniversary.
Dear Husband, We made it through another year. It’s a fucking miracle. Happy Anniversary.
Dear Husband, It’s your turn to get up to the screaming kids tonight. They are half yours, after all. Happy Anniversary.
Dear Husband, At least we’re not completely miserable. Happy Anniversary.
Dear Husband, I hope you bought me chocolate. I love chocolate. Happy Anniversary.
Dear Husband, I know it’s our anniversary, but I still have a headache. Happy Anniversary anyway.
Dear Husband, Sorry, I’m clean out of “I made the bed one time this month” medals. I hope this card will suffice. Happy Anniversary.
Dear Husband, Things are ok, don’t you think? We do alright? Will you cook dinner tonight? Happy Anniversary.
And mine, for my husband today, on our 8 year anniversary…”Dear Husband, you know I’m not into all this sappy shit, but you know, I love you ‘n all that stuff.”
Are you a romantic sap? Do you buy into the “I love you more every day” crap in Anniversary cards? Or do you want a REAL LIFE card? What would it say?
*Disclaimer – I do not relate ALL of these to our life! We only have one kid and he no longer screams at night
Linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT of course!