I Must Confess…

I have been looking for a new Monday link-up to get me blogging more often. I love the linkups that sort of give you something to talk about, like Thankful Thursday, or Things I Know Friday, it at least pushes you off in a sort of direction and gives you a head start. And lets face it, when you have bloggers block, you can do with a little push. After consulting my #TeamIBOT girls about where to linkup on Mondays, I’ve decided to give it ago with Kirsty at My Home Truths and I Must Confess, and will kill two birds with one stone and link up with Alicia at One Mother Hen for Open Slather.

The problem with confessions is that sometimes, once you start, you can’t stop. I’d hate to confess all my secrets on my first day and have nothing to write about next week. I’ll see if I can contain myself.

I must confess, in the last 4 weeks, I have gained 4kgs. One kilogram per week on average. I did not say no to one single Christmas treat/drink/desert/gift-of-chocolate.

I must confess, in the last 4 weeks, I have done less than 30 minutes exercise. Total.

I must confess, I have gone back up a dress size after dropping two in the 6 months leading up to Christmas. Man, training can not start again soon enough! This week, thank God!

I must confess, I hate training, but love the euphoric feeling I get afterwards of having a good, hard workout, knowing that I have worked hard and pushed my limits.

I must confess, when people tell me how great I look, I feel like a failure, because I was doing so amazingly well, and fell completely and totally off the wagon over the holidays.

I must confess, I hate when people talk about body image, about people being beautiful no matter what their size is. It is not my size I’m worried about, it is my health, and how I feel on the inside. I am not comfortable in my skin when I am carrying extra weight around. I am not comfortable in my skin when I am not active, don’t eat well, and don’t take care of my body. I’m not saying everyone should be size 8 and exercise fanatics, I’m saying if you’re happy in your skin, good for you, I know what I need to do to be happy in mine.

I must confess, I am both glad and terrified that training starts again this week. It has been a long 4 weeks, and I feel like I’ve lost every ounce of fitness I gained in the previous 6 months. My only goal is to not puke.

Do you have anything to confess this week? Anything in general you want to share at Open Slater? Follow the links below and check out the other bloggers! 

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19 thoughts on “I Must Confess…

  1. I must confess that I also failed to say no to a single Christmas treat. In fact if anything, I said a rather resounding yes please and I’ll have some more of that thanks! Hope the training isn’t too much of a work out for you.

    • hahaha. That was me, “Hmmm that was good, I think I’ll have MORE.” Oh dear…I’m dreading it, because even when I was at my fittest, the PT was *always* really hard! Oh well, no pain no gain!

  2. Don’t worry – it will all be fine. You will get your fitness back so much quicker this time (speaking from experience I know this happens !!!!)
    I was doing well with getting rid of kgs that I had gained before Christmas but yesterday (after in-laws left) I kind of went beserk and ate for too much of too many sugar/dairy/wheat foods/cold-drinks but that is OK – so long as I can get back on track today. You can do this – you’ve done it before and you will do it again.
    Like I said the other day – instead of being so hard on yourself – think of what you would say if it was one of us who had done what you have done – what would you tell us ? And then tell yourself those same words !!!
    Lotsa hugs – here’s to a happy and healthy 2013 !!! We’ll get there – I know we will.
    Me

    • I know. I am the worst for that – always know what to say to others but always beat myself up over the the same things! You’re right. In a couple of months I’ll be well and truly back into the swing of things! Thanks as always L!

  3. I have eaten to overfulness so much lately, it is ridiculous. I get the feeling of being happy in your skin, I am starting to feel like I need to change my habits and lose some flab. I know what I need to do, it is just getting in the right head space. Good luck for no puke!

    • I was in that right head space, but it seems so easy to get out of that space and so hard to get in!! So frustrating! I’ve been over-eating which is bad enough, but over-eating the wrong things is a double whammy! Must do better.

  4. I was sick the entire holidays, so couldn’t even manage any Christmas treats 😦 What a waste!!! Feeling better now, so could really go some trifle, pudding or champagne! Oh well.
    You’ve done such great work and your body and mind know how to train, so it will take no time to get back into it. I think that you deserved a bit of a break over Christmas in the knowledge that you were always going to get back into your health regimen afterwards, anyhow. (I hope you don’t puke too!! Good luck :))

    • Ohhh no! That’s not good being sick over Christmas holidays! I guess the silver lining is that you wouldn’t have gained the Festive Four that I did! Glad you’re better now. Might have to whip up a belated-Christmas feast! 😉

  5. I haven’t said no either and I can tell it’s affecting my mental state, although I’m too lazy to do much about it at the moment. You should focus on how you are a legend for getting back into training! I still haven’t got anywhere near that motivated yet 😦

    • I’m totally dreading it Em. I don’t want to go, but I know I have to. I will be a nervous wreck all day Wednesday waiting for training that night! It’s definitely affected my mental state. Amazing how much better exercising and eating right can make you feel! I hope I get back there ASAP!

  6. Aroha, thanks so much for linking up today. I also put on weight over Christmas and need to get back into routine again. The good thing is, we both know what we need to do now and we have proved that we can do it so we are well placed to get back into shape. Good luck with it, I’m sending positive and healthy vibes your way!

  7. I also ate far too much over Christmas with very little exercise, it is crazy how quickly you lose it but the quicker we get back to it the easier it will be to get back to where we were (I hope!!) at least you have your training sessions all planned out that is good. You will get back into it in no time and you’ll start feeling great again. I know how you feel about feeling good about yourself regardless what anyone says. Be true to yourself. Are you going to do the mini triathlon in Jan? May be a good kick start (says the girl who hasn’t booked hers yet!)
    Ha don’t listen to me – I would be a rubbish motivational speaker. xx

    • I’m not doing the mini-tri. I’ve had 4 weeks off training and the tri is next weekend! I’m in no shape at all to be doing a triathlon – mini or otherwise! I hope it’s not too long to get back to where we were. I need to start going to park run more often too. Couldn’t even run 1km the other day. Devastated 😦

      • 😦 Dont beat yourself up about it, focus on the fact that you have your training planned and booked and focus on that. Set yourself little goals to work towards at first to ease yourself in gently so that when you reach them you feel good, then set slightly harder ones as you go on. Rather than setting your goals too high because then you will be dissapointed and lose motivation if you dont reach them. Even if it is just setting yourself the goal to run 1k twice next week, then 2k, etc etc and before you know it by concentrating on little steps at a time you will get to where you were in no time. xxx

  8. Oh I love this Aroha. It’s like a confessional box but without the box. Everyone can see me, oh dear. But yes, like everyone here has posted, I too have indulged. Christmas sucks. There is a reason everyone talks about Christmas and overindulging. Nothing changes. Everyone does it. So don’t feel guilty.

    My confession – I am not one for ‘selfies’. I am not exactly the prettiest girl so doing selfies for me is something I tend to avoid like anchovies on a pizza. But this week I put one up of myself in my bikini on Facebook. Just a body shot. But I felt so insecure about it. I took it down only a few hours later. I felt like a dick. As if I could be perceived for being one of ‘those’ who did it for vanity. So not me. The reason I did it at the time was to take action. I didn’t look like that picture any more. So I need to put it out there so that it made me accountable for where I was now. But after not only feeling insecure about the picture, I realised, I didn’t need others to make me accountable, nor make me take action. That shouldn’t come from that. It should come from me. So, after two weeks of doing nothing, I am finally at that point. I’ve delved deep enough to find the motivation I’ve lacked and I am so excited. Sometimes I think we need to hit a bottom before we can bounce back up. Makes the bounce have all that much more gusto.

    Love and adore you loads xx

    p.s just realised my profile pic is a selfie. I’m such a liar!!! Okay, another confession, it really is probably the only other selfie I have … promise!!

    • Oh Mel I love and adore you heaps too. And I saw that pic you posted on fb before you took it down. I wish you had left it up! We all need our motivations and damn that was a good one! I read the comment that made you take it down, too, and I think you should just take those comments with a grain of salt. It isn’t about how you look, it’s about how you feel, which has a little to do with how you look I guess, but it is hard to train so hard then stop for a couple of weeks. That exercise -fuelled euphoria disappears pretty quickly and leaves you feeling blah and bloated and gross. It doesn’t matter what size you are, if you are used to being small or have lost a lot of weight, or have toned up and you lose that in any shape or form it is emotionally and mentally difficult. You know your body type, you know what you’re capable of, you know what weight/look you’re capable of achieving, so don’t let anyone tell you not to try and strive for that. I have heaps more to say on this matter. Will talk about it in person when I see you next!! X

  9. Wow Aroha, it’s like you’ve confessed for me too! I too have said no to absolutely nothing over Christmas and am now re-motivating myself to get back on the weightloss-fitness-wagon. And you’re so right about the body image thing, it’s about how each of us feels in our own skin.

    Go you – get back on that wagon and kick it’s butt in 2013, I know I intend to.

    G. xx

    • Do you know I think I’ve already lost some of that weight just from NOT eating all the Christmas treats like chocolates, deserts, etc?!!? Amazing what a different the food you put in your mouth makes!

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