Dear Nicklas {600th Blog Post}

Dear Nicklas,

It’s been a while since I wrote you a letter. It’s not that I don’t think of it, it’s just that life seems to get in the way. I also kept hoping I’d have something really exciting to write to you about, like you becoming a big brother. But as close to that as I’m going to get, is that you’re going to have 2 new cousins in the next 5 months! A girl and a boy, which is very exciting! I can’t wait to see you with them.

The other exciting news is that we are about to go on a holiday to New Zealand. Chances are you won’t remember any of this holiday by the time you read these letters. There will be plenty of pictures to prove you were there, but I’m not sure what you’ll really remember.

You’re so grown up now, a real little boy! There is not one ounce of “baby” in you, but you will always be my baby. And you may be my only baby. We are coming to terms with that, even though the hardest part is feeling like I’ve failed you by not giving you a sibling. I suppose being an only child, you’ll know no different. I promise I’ll try my best not to smother you and not to baby you because you are an only child. I promise (myself) not to let you become a “spoiled brat”, but the fact is, as an only child you wil probably get more, do more, have more opportunities than you would if there was a sibling.

I hope that you will always be surrounded by family and friends and won’t feel lonely because you’re an only child. I hope that we will find the right balance of being a parent and a friend and that you’ll always feel like we will support you no matter what. I hope you will always feel like you can talk to us and that we won’t tell you what to do or say we told you so.

My greatest hope is just that you will be happy.  Life can be tough, but it can also be amazing if you let it. If you always look for the positive, if you’re grateful for each glorious day that you’re given, if you choose happiness, and keep your mind and heart open, the world will be your oyster.

You may not have a brother or a sister, but you will always have your mum and dad and family who love you to pieces. I so love the little boy you have become. You make me laugh on a daily basis and I can’t wait to see what kind of a man you grow in to.

All my love,

Linking up for #IBOT with Jess at Diary of a Stay At Home Mum


21 thoughts on “Dear Nicklas {600th Blog Post}

  1. I love these letters that you write to N – I hope that he treasures then when he is older. I so wish I had done something like this for K. I wonder if it is too late to start now ? Maybe I should do them and she gets them when I die – is that too morbid ? I guess the other thing would be how to get them to her after I have died.
    Have the best day !

    • I was concerned when I started writing them, that it seemed morbid, like I was writing these letters in case I wasn’t around when he was older. I make sure the universe knows I fully intend to be here to give these to him myself. I have them all printed out and in a folder. I’m not sure when he’ll get them, but I feel like I’ll know when he needs them or is ready for them. Maybe he’ll have no interest, who knows, but I love writing them.

  2. I have a tear in my eye, actually a few. This is so precious, your love and your awe at your little boy shines through every.single.letter.
    Nick is a very lucky little boy to have you as his mama. As long as you love him with all you have, you are doing the best job you can.
    So excited to hear about how he is with 2 new littl’uns!

    A – have you thought about adoption?


    • Thanks Meagan. He really is my whole life, my purpose for living! We would adopt in a heart beat, but from all I’ve heard and read it is not that easy? And we don’t have the finances for o/s adoption.

  3. Yeah I completely understand, I don’t know much about it myself, maybe a bit silly for me to just say that to you, so apologies if it came across naive etc.
    Sending love and hugs xx

    • no no need for apologies at all, it’s a legitimate question! I have always been keen to adopt, hubby not so much, but give what we’ve now gone through, he’s much more open to the idea. I just wish it was easier to do. So many kids need homes, but a friend of mine who’s worked in the system said parents never sign away their rights so kids in Australia end up in foster care and never eligible for adoption, if that makes sense.

  4. I love this! I haven’t read one of your letters before…

    I have updated my blog calendars with people’s birthdays that I would like to honour with a birthday letter, BabyCool turns 2 in a few weeks…. I can’t believe it!

    This is such a beautiful gift to give your son… I am so honoured to have been allowed access to this mother/son time. Very special. *tissue please*

    • I wrote them more frequently early on. Would like to get back in to the habit. I know my memory, I’ll forget all this stuff by the time he grows up. Would love to have insight into my mum’s thoughts from when I was a baby/kid.

  5. Oh you are such a beautiful mum, and he is such a blessed little boy to have you, even if he is maybe a little spoilt. And if you do spoil him, who cares?
    Happy 600 posts xx

    • Thanks Jess! I figure a little spoiling is ok, all kids should be spoiled a bit! And maybe lots of other parents spoil their only children because the decision to have only one child was not theirs, so they’re just thankful for what they have? See a whole different side to having an only child now that we have one.

    • Thanks Grace! I hope he does look back on them fondly and not like “Mum you’re such a sappy dork.” HA HA! i think girls would be much more appreciative of something like this, but I hope I’m wrong!

  6. What a beautiful post Aroha – he is so lucky to have you. And happy 600th post too, that’s quite an achievement. Here’s to many, many more!

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