Debbie Downer. Negative Nelly. There’s a few names for people who like to be a wet rag. In week 40 of Deb’s 52 Weeks to Simplify Your Life challenge, we’re talking about how to eliminate energy-sapping, negative people, and relationships, from our lives.
Generally speaking I feel like I’ve always surrounded myself with people who enriched my life. I don’t know if that’s been on purpose/consciously, or more of a subconscious thing. I once de-friended someone (an online friend) and blocked them from all online communications because I couldn’t handle their negativeness and I knew it was just bringing me down. Well, did I cop it in an email! I chose to ignore that and get on with life. It was just further proof that I had done the right thing. You can only give so much compassion, empathy, listening without getting any back before enough is enough. I realise now this person was probably suffering major depression and was really struggling. But nothing I said was helping or getting through, and my mood was affected by this friend. In the end, I had to think of my own happiness and mental state.
In another spin on this topic, I think I went through a stage of being the negative one. In fact, it was not that long ago! I got so sick of my own whinging, I wondered how anyone else could possibly put up with me/it. Thankfully, I found Deb’s 52 Week Challenge and also started my gratitude journal. I couldn’t believe how much my attitude changed in such a quick/short time. I pulled myself out of my rutt and I feel pretty confident I’ve managed to stay out. 2012 has definitely been a year of change for me, and that included my outlook on life. I still struggle from time to time with different battles, but for the most part, I know how to get back on track when I feel it slipping. And I think the thing I learned through all that is that it’s no one else’s responsibility but my own to make sure I am happy and positive. It was bad enough that I was in this hole, I certainly didn’t want to drag anyone down with me.
The bottom line when it comes to relationships in your life, good and bad, is that life is too short. It’s way too short to waste precious time on people who bring you down or take advantage of you. Take stock of who is important and who enriches your life. They will make the ride that much more worthwhile.