It’s week 2 of March To Your Own Beat with Laney at Crash Test Mummy. If I don’t know myself inside out by the end of this challenge as well as Deb’s 52 Weeks To Simplify Your Life, then I never will! I love that these challenges have really forced me to think about a lot of things, myself, my goals, my dreams, my achievements, my blessings..the list just goes on and on. I’m so thankful for all the lovely, supportive, inspirational women I’m meeting along the way!
Week 2 of MTYOB really aligns with the 52 Weeks to SYL. It asks us to think about what we want to change, what our values are, what we are most proud of, what we want to be remembered for, what makes time stand still for us, what our treasured possessions are and what we are totally and emotionally committed to.
More than anything, I have really wanted to do something about my attitude, my outlook on life, how I act and react to things both positive but mostly negative. That’s what got me started on this journey in the first place. I previously wrote about my values for the SYL project here. Family, happiness, balance, gratitude and security. All things I’ve really been working on the last few months and I feel like I’ve done pretty well and working on them. But I’ve also noticed that they’re not something that will ever be a finished work. They are works in progress, always. Those things, family, happiness, balance, gratitude, they don’t just happen on their own or with a wave of a magic wand. I can’t do them for 12 months and expect them to then carry on without attention or help or work from me. And that’s ok, because I’m learning how to make them work, and how to put in the effort to make it happen.
I’ve also recently written, for MTYOB, about things I did before I was a mum. I have a university degree, I have run a fairly large non-profit organisation, I have traveled to some of the most amazing places in the world. I have done great things and had great experiences. I wouldn’t say any one moment has made me more proud than the next, but what does make me the most proud, is when people compliment me on what a wonderful son I have. Because I know that while we possibly hit the genetic lottery, most likely it means we are doing something right, as parents. And it is so reassuring to know you are doing the right thing!
I recently talked about my fears, and mentioned that I was afraid my life would mean nothing at the end, that I’d never do anything important, and that I’d leave no legacy. What I’ve come to realise, is that our children are our legacy. Not everyone will do something like cure cancer, or legalise gay marriage. For 99% of the population, the legacy we leave is in the way our children contribute to society, their values, their ambition. Sometimes it’s not just our own children we influence. The non-profit I worked for had over 1000 kids every year. I hope that somewhere along the line, I did something or said something that one of those kids has taken with them into their adult life. The fact that any of them are actually adults still scares the crap out of me. Time is too fast. I’m not sure it ever stands still for me for anything. I feel like it just goes faster and faster. I can freeze time, in photographs, and I love looking back on those memories. If only I really could get time to stand still. We are in the best time of our lives at the moment, and I don’t want to leave it.