I can’t watch the news anymore. In the last two weeks I have heard about a father and his 2 young sons who drowned (they were fishing and the boys fell in and the father tried to save them), twin 21 month old boys who were found in the family pool (one died one is in critical condition), and a 4 year old girl who was swept away from her mother while swimming when a dam support broke. Her body was found 12 hours later.
I can’t stop thinking about the woman who lost her whole family in one swoop, the parents who two days ago had beautiful twin boys, and who are now hoping one of them will be strong enough to live while they mourn the other, and the mother who will probably never forget the feeling of not being able to hold on to her little girl tight enough.
When you hear these stories, but don’t have children, you know deep down how tragic it is, but when you have a child, or children, your heart just aches that much more because you can’t imagine your life without them. And you realise what these other parents are facing.
I still have times where if Nicklas naps longer than usual, or is “talking” and goes quiet, that I panic for a second, and check to make sure he’s ok and still breathing. I don’t know how you get past something like losing a child, or your whole family. I can’t imagine that you ever get over it, but I think you have to find a way to get past it and keep living your life, even though a huge part of you has died. But I don’t know how.